“Tôi chợt nhớ ai đó từng hỏi mình: “thế nào mới là đau khổ tận cùng?”
Là người mình yêu thương qua đời. Thực sự vô cùng tồi tệ, người gần gũi như da thịt đột nhiên bị xẻo xuống, người ở trong tim mà moi ra lấy mất. Còn gì tồi tệ hơn? Người ta yêu thương bằng cả cuộc đời , trong 1 giây, trong 1 lần chớp mắt. Họ vĩnh viễn bị xóa sổ sự tồn tại…
Về nhà mở cửa ra, quen miệng kêu lên “Con về rồi” lại chỉ thấy khoảng không lạnh ngắt, một màn đen trùm lấy ngôi nhà, không ai đáp lại, không mùi thức ăn thoang thoảng, không gì cả, không ai cả, không một ai kêu bạn dọn phòng, không một ai dặn dò bạn ra ngoài đường phải mặc áo khoác, không một ai cằn nhằn kêu bạn bấm điện thoại ít lại, không ai cả…không 1 ai.
Đang ở bếp, quen miệng gọi “Anh ơi, rửa giúp em quả cà chua”. Để rồi trả lời chỉ còn là tiếng nức nở đến khản đặc, tiếng tim vỡ nát, tiếng cảm xúc vỡ òa trong tuyệt vọng. Điên cuồng gọi tên, điên cuồng tìm kiếm, điên cuồng gào thét. Cũng không mang được người về. Người cũng không dỗ dành ta, người cũng không vì ta mà rầu rĩ cả ngày…
Nếu, xin bạn hãy để tôi dùng từ nếu. Nếu hành trình cả đời này của bạn không còn họ, nếu cả cuộc đời này của bạn không còn vì họ mà kiên cường sống, nếu dự tính mà bạn dày công suy tính, vị trí của họ đột nhiên rỗng tuếch, hãy cho tôi biết, làm sao bạn tồn tại nổi đây…?
Hãy trân trọng họ. Bằng tất cả của bạn. Vì họ và vì bạn.“
Nguồn: Sống Lại Giữa Thanh Xuân Của Người Già
Tranh: Myeong-Minho
Tiếp tục với Facebook
Hoặc đăng nhập với Google
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